We often feel alone, distressed, anxious or down for no apparent reason. We also, as humans, have a penchant for exaggerating the dimensions of our problems and blowing the effects of undesirable circumstances out of proportions. We obsess about counterproductive objects of desire and give into various compulsions, hoping to achieve peace of mind, but in reality all these actions manage to do is to sink us deeper and deeper in an unhealthy mental state. Therapy and pharmaceutical drugs are able to provide relief to a certain extent, but you have to be ready and willing to take the next steps on your own and start the process of emotional healing. Let's find out about a few tips that could help!
1. If You like Eggs Benedict, Eat Eggs Benedict!
Remember how the main character in Runaway Bride always ate her eggs however the man she was dating at the time ate them? There are few things that have the propensity to cause us as much distress as attempting to behave in a manner that is uncharacteristic to our way of thinking. Renouncing our personal core beliefs, stepping over the boundaries we've imposed for ourselves and gratuitously trying to conduct ourselves by someone else's rules just to impress and convey a different image are the main ingredients of the recipe for unhappiness. Rather than do all those things, accept and love yourself for what you actually are!
2. Start Developing and Investing in Yourself
The next step implies taking those traits that are great about you and utilizing them to improve and develop yourself in the right direction. Teach yourself every day to be calmer and less judgmental of others – and yourself –, to be less selfish and more generous, to become more productive and wallow less in self-pity.
3. Don't Obsess over How Your First Boyfriend Broke Your Heart Years Ago
Our experiences have a formative role, in the sense that each one is designed to teach us something about the world. However, once the lesson is learned, you'll need to muster the strength to move on and stop allowing the negative emotions like anxiety, sadness or anger triggered by these experiences to exercise control over your future. It's easy to develop a codependent relationship with misery otherwise, and happiness might appear like an increasingly intangible state of mind!
4. Create Meaning Instead of Searching for It
The meaning of our lives has represented the perpetual quest of scholars and philosophers throughout the ages, but no one has found an undeniable definition of what it is. Having a meaningful life is all about creating it. Find and engage in activities that bring you satisfaction, seize every opportunity that presents itself to you and don't be afraid to allow yourself to enjoy each moment.
5. Take Charge of Your Thoughts
A negative way of thinking is perhaps the greatest source of discomfort and distress, particularly if we don't question the validity and usefulness of those thoughts. It's time to start dissociating between a productive state of mind and one that paralyzes and leads to inaction and sadness.
6. Focus on Your Intentions Instead of Your Mood
Anxiety and depression have a way of making us believe that all our efforts are in vain, no matter how we choose to approach the problems. Unfortunately, that leads to a counterproductive conduct, loads of wasted time and missed opportunities, and a seemingly inescapable spiral of negativity. Instead of focusing on how bad things are now, try to set a routine that encompasses every single moment of the day and stick to it. It doesn't matter whether it details how you plan to rest, work or spend time with your friends, as long you have a solid plan.
7. Take Action or Forget about It!
Finally, emotional healing requires understanding that certain aspects of your life and the world around you are not under your control, while others are. If you're not happy with your current relationship, perhaps it's time to seek companionship elsewhere, if your job is causing you too much stress, perhaps a different career path would be more appropriate. On the other hand, you can't change the state of the economy, people's opinions on controversial topics, so on and so forth. Why waste energy worrying about something if you have absolutely no control over it?
Do you know any other tips that promote emotional healing and genuine happiness? What strategies do you use to cope?