Ever feel like your friend’s subtly shady actions could be signs that your friend is toxic? Ever have concerns about whether she’s your true blue pal or arch nemesis? I think we’ve all felt apprehensive at one time about whether a friend truly has our back or is getting ready to stab us in the back. Check for these 8 signs that your friend is toxic to determine if it’s time to dump your friend.
1. She Only Calls when She Needs Something
This is one of the most common signs of a selfish friend and a sure sign that your friend is toxic. Good relationships should be balanced, and if you are always going out of your way to help your friend but she’s nowhere to be found when you need someone, this is a definite no-no. Some friends might be going through a tough time and need you on the regular, but the key here is that she’s never there to help you.
2. It’s All about Her
Do you ever feel like your conversations with your friend revolve only around her and the drama in her life? And when you try to bring something up about yourself it inevitably results in the convo focusing back on her? This is another characteristic of a toxic friend! How is she even a friend if she doesn’t care to keep up on your life? Chatterboxes aside, if your friend’s only interest is to talk about herself and not even take the time to listen to you in casual chit-chat, she’s a bad friend.
3. Being around Her Wears You out
If lunch dates and cocktail hours with your friend leave you feeling mentally drained and exhausted, it could be a sign that you friend is toxic. Does your friend have a billion problems, needs endless favors and reassurance about her appearance all before the first round of drinks? We all have our moments when we have drama and need favors, but if every get-together leaves you feeling like you just completed an Iron Man triathlon; it could be time to break up with your friend.
4. She Mocks You
Life is hard enough without having a shady-lady friend who enjoys picking on us. Does your friend ever turn your appearance, choice in men, movie picks, etc. into comedy hour? Sure, it’s cool to playfully poke fun at friends at times, like that time you accidentally farted in front of your crush, but there’s a fine line between playing around and putting someone down. If she acts like a bully, it’s time to move on from your toxic friend!
5. She Gossips about You
We all get caught up in gossip on occasion but when you have a friend who gossips about you, it’s an indubitable sign to dump your friend. If you’ve caught her telling your secrets, spreading rumors or gossip, get out now! Your life is not a means of entertainment for others and she shouldn’t be spilling secrets when she swore she’d never tell.
6. She’s a Habitual Flake
Life gets busy, we have a million things going on at one time, but we’d like to depend on our friends to come through on plans. If your BFF is constantly cancelling plans or dropping her plans with you for a guy, it’s a sign that your friend is toxic. If she’s consistently putting you second to everything else, why bother making time for her when she doesn’t have time for you?
7. She’s Constantly Competing with You
Some competition can be healthy, I agree, but if everything in your friendship turns into a competition, it’s another sign your friend is toxic. Competition between friends should be healthy, fun and bring out the best in you two. If your "friendly competitions" are turning into crazy games and bragging contests, it can get unhealthy and draining.
8. She’s Dangerous
Dangerous meaning she’s into drugs, crime, or anything that can possibly place herself or you in any danger. Perhaps she’s gotten into drugs or her new boyfriend has ties to some unsavory characters; whatever the case, if she’s bringing you into unsafe and uncomfortable situations, it’s time to move on from your friend.
It’s always hard to break up with a friend, but if these signs that your friend is toxic sound familiar, you’re better off without them. Yes, you will miss them and it won’t be easy, but your health and sanity are paramount to bad friends with toxic behavior.
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