Here are a few very obvious signs that you fear abandonment. The fear of abandonment is very similar to a phobia and it’s defined as “[a]n irrational belief that one is in imminent danger of being personally rejected, discarded or replaced.” People who suffer from this type of fear often sabotage their own relationships, they become clingy and demanding and they often seem jealous without having any reasons to feel this way. People who suffer from fear of abandonment are more likely to not trust the ones around them, they are more cynical and they often feel anxious and insecure. Here are a few signs that you fear abandonment that you should consider:
1. You over-generalize
One of the clearest signs that you fear abandonment is that you often react in an inappropriate way and you tend to over-generalize everything. Don’t let fear make you over-generalize a possible treat and don’t let it stand in the way of your happiness. Just remember that people are different and that they react in different ways.
2. You Often Hide behind Your Fear
Another very clear sign that you fear abandonment is the fact that you often hide behind your fear. If you want to learn how to manage those feelings in a healthier way, you must name your fear and unmask that beast. Discover where did this fear come from and work on solving those issues that are preventing you from feeling happy in your relationship.
3. You Dwell on Your past
Make peace with your past and don’t dwell on it. What’s done is done; it was not your fault and the best thing you can do now is to not let those events prevent you from living a happy and meaningful life. Just sort out the past and move on since you have a lot of wonderful things to focus on.
4. You Feel Very Insecure
If you often feel very insecure and you fear that your partner may abandon you, try to make a list of all your strengths, qualities, talents and skills, so you can remind yourself what a wonderful person you are, one who deserves to be loved and who has all the resources she needs to overcome any obstacle that may appear in her path. Also, remind yourself that there are a lot of people who love and support you no matter what and who will help you face any challenges, no matter how difficult they might be.
5. You Don’t Enjoy Your Relationship as You Used to
The fear of abandonment will make you sabotage your relationship, you won’t be able to realize what a wonderful person you are and you won’t enjoy your relationship as you used to. Just try to focus on having fun with your partner. Do fun things together and simply enjoy each other’s company!
6. You Are Not Focusing on the Present
Don’t dwell on your past and try not to worry too much about your future. Focus on the present moment and enjoy it. You are with your partner, so instead of sabotaging that wonderful thing that you have, you could try to improve it by being more confident and by allowing him or her to have their personal space.
7. You Have Low Self-esteem
Most people who fear abandonment also have very low self-esteem and they lack self-confidence. That’s why they often feel insecure and they fear that their partner will abandon them because they are not good enough for them. If you don’t want to let this type of thinking sabotage your relationship and your happiness, try to work on building a healthier self-esteem and boosting your self-confidence.
The fear of abandonment can be overwhelming sometimes since it can cause you a lot of insecurities and doubt. Do you know any other signs that someone may fear abandonment? Please share your thoughts with us in the comments section!